I slip in bed when you're asleep
To hold you close and feel your breath on me
Tomorrow there'll be so much to do
So tonight I'll drift in a dream with you
This past Sunday afternoon among the hustle and bustle of our house, I took time out of the afternoon to slip into our dark, quiet, cool bedroom and lay next to Asher while he slept. There was so much to do…more laundry, more cleaning…more unimportant things. But at that moment, I chose to stay next to my angel and watch him sleep.
He is everything I’ve always dreamed of and never even knew I was missing. He is perfect in every way. His face so delicate, the way he holds onto my hand as he begins to close his eyes, the peaceful sound of his breath and he drifts to sleep knowing that I’m lying next to him. In that instant, that was the one and only thing I needed to do.
In that moment, I realized that I have missed so many of these moments. In four short months, he has grown and changed – and it feels like a blur. Maybe because I used to try so hard to get him to sleep, so I could lay him down and get more things done. Or sit him in his bouncy chair while he talked and smiled, while I felt the need to tend to dishes or check my email.
I began to cry. How could I have not realized the important moments I was missing to do such unimportant things? How could I choose to continue to bustle around, when I could be sitting there soaking up every second with him? I suddenly began to appreciate how fleeting these moments are, and how he’ll be all grown up before I know it.
I realize that not every day will allow me to sit and enjoy every single minute with Asher, but I want to hold that moment I shared with him this weekend, forever. Choosing to lay next to him, sharing a peaceful moment among a chaotic house full of other things that I thought were so important... it was the best thing I accomplished all weekend.It made me appreciate what the true “needs” are of every day…to simply soak up every incredible smile, laugh and breath that he takes.
