Blessings from God

On Friday, I had a breakdown. My dad was in the hospital, my mom wrecked the car, and my husband lost his job. I couldn’t be strong anymore, I felt defeated and I sobbed.

On Sunday we went to church. The tears streamed down my face as I prayed not only for my family, but for all those friends who were also enduring hardship, sickness and grief. I listened to the service with an open heart, on my knees emotionally and humbled by the power of God’s word and what he can do in my life if I remember to “give it to him”. I felt humbled and ashamed in front of God. Humbled facing sudden unexpected challenges; a reminder of God’s power. He is in control of everything, not us.

“And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you these forty years in the wilderness, that he might humble you, testing you to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep his commandments or not.”  Deuteronomy 8:2

Ashamed because we were running along in life like so many of us do, collecting checks and buying things with little thought to what God wants us to do with what HE was providing for us. How naïve of me to think that that was our money! Everything we have is God’s. We are merely his servants blessed with those gifts to do God’s will. I hadn’t been ungrateful, but I had become arrogant in thinking that what I had in my life was mine.

“You may say to yourself, ‘My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me.’ But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your forefathers, as it is today.” Deuteronomy 8:17-19

Today is a new day; yet the reality of what my family is facing continues to weave into my thoughts and plague my heart with worry. But today, instead of a breakdown, I had a breakthrough. Not only was God using this challenging time to awaken us to our ignorance and call us to Him, it was an reminder to appreciate the joy already in our life. There is joy in every day, but I had been missing it, blinded by my own agenda and selfish wishes for more than what I had been provided.

Everything I have is a gift from God: the ability to walk through the fresh crisp fall leaves, or the soft blankets I sleep under every night; watching my beautiful son sleep peacefully in his bed, or the comfort I find in my husband’s arms. There is SO MUCH joy in my life, my cup overflows. I had my blinders on – not appreciating all that I already had, and not sharing enough of it with others.

At this crossroads, this is where I stop to listen and give thanks. Listen to what God is asking of me. Thanks for awakening me to His power in my life. Thanks for reminding me that all I have is a gift from Him. Thanks for the blessings that have been poured upon me and the ability to share them with those around me. Thanks be to God.