I wanna go....

Home - ”a place of residence or refuge”

I heard the word used today in the elevator when someone remarked, “If it starts raining in here today, I’m going home for the day!” And for a brief minute, I indulged in the word itself. HOME….how good it sounds.

Being stuck at work on a rainy day that would be better spent in bed under the covers may not be the best example. But referring to the joy of home occurs in my conversations on a weekly basis. There are so many times when I hear or use the word home and get a feeling of longing and comfort. Perhaps it’s after a long road trip, “I can’t wait to get home,” or the comfort I feel when I hear my husband say, “don’t worry, I’ll be home soon.” Even smaller references that we hardly ever notice, like when the kids say “I can’t wait to get home so we can watch movies together” provides a feeling of ease.

Not surprisingly, I don’t feel that the word home implies the structure itself. It is more the feeling derived from being there. I love being at home because it’s my space, it is where I am the most comfortable, it’s where so many wonderful memories are created, and it is where my family keeps me company. The word home can be applied to so many aspects of our lives. It could be, in its simplest form, where your family is. It could be a hotel room (like my brother Todd and his family in Germany right now) or the tiny 1 bedroom apartment we all started out in. More often then not, it’s not about what type of structure it is or how much you spent on it – but how it makes you feel when you are there.

I take such pride in my home, not only as a structure, but as my place of solace. I hate leaving it when I wake up in the morning, and count the hours until I can go back. I love knowing that it provides everything I need, and that it is a place where my family and I can feel safe and together. It is a place where I can retreat from the cares of today, and put off the worries of tomorrow, and simply absorb its graciousness.

Knowing that there is a place I have created, not only for myself, but my family – where we can be together and be surrounded by all the things we love, is such an amazing feeling.

Invisible?

I heard on the news last night that scientists have taken the first step towarsd creating an invisible cloak! That's crazy! I think there are already days where I feel invisible without any cloak needed. Yesterday was one of those days for me.

I go to work, keep my head down (because I have so much to do), occasionally chat with friends for a minute, but otherwise....I am invisible. In the evening, I'm alone at home relaxing, the phone doesn't ring, no one comes to the door ...I am invisible.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes it is nice to literally fly under the radar. If I'm having a bad day and want to be left alone, or if I really need to just get away from everything - those are great days to keep to yourself and hope not to be noticed. But most days, I enjoy interaction with others. I love friends asking how my weekend was, or my husband calling to say he misses me. Those things make the difference between a good day and a bad day.

Last night, lying in bed at midnight not being able to sleep....I was listening to the utter stillness outside and wondered what it was like to be completely invisible for a day? No one to notice you and say hi, no one to call and make sure you're still alive, just total and utter seclusion from everyone.

I may not have been secluded from anything yesterday....but some reason, I still felt invisible.